#gibberish from a disturbed mind- Part 2

click here for the first part of the story!

I don’t know for how long I slept. All I woke up to was a very bad headache. The alarm clock was lying beside me, perhaps dead from the endless screams it did to break my slumber, but in vain. 

The afternoon sun rays hit hard on the eyes and I squinted to see the time on my cell phone.

12:30pm.

Not the time, but the notifications got my eyes hooked.

12 text messages. 9 missed calls.

I let out a sigh, it must be mom, reminding me of my psychiatrist’s appointment.

Wish you were here, Chetan.

Half an hour from then, I was back to the window. The scorching heat outside, the busy road, people, the rickshaw-pullers, made me restless.

There is a world out there, moving on, without me.

For having nothing else to do, I checked into my online account.

“Hi. Good morning.” The faceless, nameless text sender was there, again.

“Yes, morning.” Wake up with this bad a headache at late noon, and try saying ‘Good Morning’ .

“If you care, I am here to help. He won’t be back. Grow over it.”

I pulled back in shock. The mention of ‘He’ already sent a chill through my spine.

My fingers trembled as I wrote the reply, “WHO ARE YOU?”

How on earth do you know so much about me?

“Does that matter? I am here to help you.”

“Say the name, or you get blocked right away.” I felt the goose bumps, now.

“Miss, for all I know..

You WON’T block me.” And a smiling emoticon, came with it.

Who are you? A stalker? A friend? Or wait, CHETAN?

Irregular sleep, inactive days and wasting hours beside the window, looking at the disturbingly busy world outside, often makes you go beyond truths and hallucinate about impossibles. I was no exception.

“Miss, where are you lost?” the blinking chat box brought me back to reality again.

Fifteen minutes from then, I was driving to my psychiatrist’s chamber. I needed few words with her.

.. To be continued.

#Gibberish from a disturbed mind

‘Hi!’ , a new chat box blinked on the internet page.

I was still in bed, the computer left connected to the internet for simply no reasons. Lying flat on the stomach and face stuffed into the pillow, my mind was taking a stroll. I pushed myself up, and looked up to the window. The leaves bathing in the tired sunlight made a soothing ambience all around. I let my nostrils take a stretch and breathe in the fresh air. And then it dawned on me, it’s going to be night again.

Beautiful evenings come with loathsome nights in its kitty.

For some moments, I was back in my psychiatrist’s chamber. A soothing blue haze surrounded the room. I could hardly see the face that was talking to me, asking about my darkest secrets and a death.

“So, Miss Shraddha Roy, tell me about you? What’s wrong in your life? May be I can help.”

Yes right, you can help. Make a dead person alive, can you?

“We were supposed to get married this March”, I said, showing off my engagement ring. The diamond shone mockingly on the platinum crater. I felt the blue haze, the darkness, the chamber laughing at me, silently, at my misery.

‘Ma’am, you have been suffering from situational depression, but it’s okay. We can work on it together. You will be fine soon.’ The faceless voice now came into view, ethnic earrings, a big bindi and two kohl-smeared calm eyes, smiling assurance to me.

Then she went on telling something about depressions being curable, but clearly I was not listening. I stared at her moving lips and broke down, perhaps for the first time after Chetan’s death.

The morgue, Chetan’s lifeless body, the blood and the gruesome description of the accident, all at once, it came back to haunt me.

‘Hi. Are you there?’ the chat box blinked again.

I was back to the bed, to the window, the drowning sun and the air. I walked up to the computer and typed a reply, “Yes. Say?”

“Up for some schmoozing?”

“Yes, only after I know you.” I am disturbed, Get Lost.

“I happen to know your sad story. You must be very disturbed?”

“How come you know about me?” Is my ‘sad story’ doing the rounds in newspapers? Get Lost, will you?

“Miss, this is just to tell you, life is not unfair. You just need to keep calm.” And with it came a smiling emoticon

.

Love someone for five long years, get engaged and then one night receive a phone call about his death, yes life 

seems fair.

I was just about to type a reply very rude, when this nameless text sender went offline.

.. to be continued.